After a few weepy days, I'm feeling better. I got my period -- which while it took away the glimmer of a false negative, it also made me move on. That cycle is over and done with, and a new cycle means a new opportunity.
And so I'm going in tomorrow for an ultrasound to see if there are any residual cysts left over from last month's dose of clomid. I'm fully expecting there to be, given the trends of the last few months. But I'm okay with that, because I can take this month to get back into the swing of things at the gym.
I have my first really good work out in months last night. I have an adorable new trainer who dotes on me. It's a shame he's only 22. He even sent me an email tonight telling me he missed me and was bored without me there tonight (I had acupuncture). We did upper body and abs, and tomorrow he's going to work me hard with lower body.
I really haven't felt that good after a workout since I've started this whole fertility thing. I think between the hormones and my mind being focused on the baby thing, that I couldn't really focus on working out like I used to.
But if there is anything good that has come from my failed attempts, it has given me a sense of balance. Or at least reminded me that I need to have a better sense of balance -- and not focus (obsess, really) on just one thing. My life needs to be about more than just one thing.
My resolution for Lent -- to not complain, or should I say complain for the sake of complaining. For every complaint, I need to find a way to resolve it.
It will help me stay positive.
A happy mind means a happy body.
(PS....thanks Nina for your kind words).
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